The Weight of A Promise
by willofthering
Summary: On a cold winter evening before the quest, Fíli remembers a promise he made long ago and he is determined not to break it whatever the cost.


**Disclaimer: I own nothing of this amazing world though I love these two brothers dearly. This is my first time venturing into Middle Earth as a writer so hopefully it's not too apparent. **

The sun set above the trees casting shadows across the frozen lake. A red sunset filled the sky. The trees with their branches heavily ladened with snow, shivered in the wind as the day turned to night.

Fíli shivered as well as the wind bit through his coat. He trudged along, glancing wearily upon the setting sun knowing there was no way they would make it home before nightfall. He cursed their foolishness in traveling so far and waiting so long to return home. The temperature dropped rapidly after nightfall, and it was already cold.

He turned his head toward his brother following behind him in the snow. "Kíli, we must make haste. It will be night soon," he called.

"Are you afraid of the dark, brother?" Kíli merely laughed in reply, his seemingly boundless energy unaffected by the cold. He let out a peel of laughter as he pulled back a low hanging branch to send a sprinkling of snow Fíli's direction.

Kíli's infectious laughter caused a grin to creep across Fíli's face. "No, but I fear the state mother will be in if we are late."

Kíli raised an eyebrow and tossed his head. "You forget, it was my bow and arrow that brought down tonight's dinner. She will have no ill will toward a son as talented as me. Remind me again how many rabbits your arrows fell today?" Kíli hoisted the rabbits he carried on his back in the air for Fíli to see again with a cheeky grin.

Fíli shook his head and turned back to the snowy path smiling at his brother's antics. He did not deny the area where his brother's skills surpassed his own. Kíli's skill with bow and arrow was unrivaled and while Fíli could still best his brother in many other tasks, he was quite proud of his younger brother's talent. It didn't hurt that it was quite helpful in putting food on the table either.

He scooped up a pile of snow from the side of the path with a gloved hand and swiftly sent it sailing towards Kíli's head. Fíli's aim was true and sent Kíli stumbling and shaking the powdery snow out of his hair. "My aim is not as poor as you seem to think. Then again, I could hardly miss a target with such an inflated head."

Kíli chuckled taking the snow in stride and jogged along the icy path to catch up with Fíli. "I see that it is your wrath I should be wary of and not mother's. I did not realize you were so thin skinned. Perhaps it is is the cold. Snow on the ground has always made you grumpy!"

"Aye, that is because the snow has always made you more foolish than usual." Fíli answered reflecting on the numerous winter pranks Kíli had devised over the years. Most of the pranks, Fíli had participated in but a few had been directed at him.

Kíli had always been at home in the cold winter. Fíli merely withstood the frigid weather, looking forward to the melting of snow in spring and the warm days of summer. Kíli had been born on a night much colder than the night that approached in a winter much longer and darker than Fíli could ever remember.

Fíli had been quite young at the time, but he still remembered chill of that winter and the panic of Kíli's arrival. It was the first night he had ever gone to bed without his mother or father tucking him safely away in his bed.

The evening meal was interrupted and unfinished when his mother, clutching her stomach cried out the baby was coming. Uncle Thorin had rushed away from the diner table in such a flurry, Fíli was not sure where he was going. His father had exclaimed that it was too early, but the meaning was lost on Fíli. In a matter of moments the dinner table was deserted and Fíli sat alone wondering at what was happening.

The rest of the night passed in much the same manner. He watched from the corner as the midwife entered their home with Thorin and listened to the cries of his mother and the worried conversations of the adults. Fíli sat still, trying to piece together what was happening for what seemed like many hours. His eyes grew heavy but he feared going to sleep because he knew something was not right in the house.

Finally Thorin approached. The light of the fire reflected in his Thorin's eyes and for a moment they appeared to be blazing. Emotions Fíli had never seen passed over his uncle's stoic face before he picked him up in his strong arms. "Oh, Fíli," he breathed on his neck, holding him close. "I am so sorry."

Puzzled, Fíli looked up into Thorin's blue eyes.

"The baby is coming now, but we should never have left you alone for so long. It is far past your bedtime," he said as he carried Fíli to his room.

He pulled the covers back and gently laid Fíli down on his bed. He pulled the covers back up to his chin and placed a gentle kiss on Fíli's head. "Sleep now, child."

"What about mama?" Fíli asked in quiet voice.

Thorin paused before answering choosing his words carefully. "Babies being born takes a lot of work. We shall see if you can see her in the morning."

"Oh," Fíli did not like the word in if in his uncle's reply. He felt tears in his eyes he did not understand. "Uncle," Fíli's voice quivered barely a whisper, "I am frightened."

"My dear child," Thorin answered placing one large hand on Fíli's head and stroked his golden hair, "so am I."

Seeing the confusion in Fíli's young face, Thorin continued. "I am worried for your mother and the new baby. Bravery does not occur in the absence of fear, but in spite of it. We must take courage and be strong for those around us. Can you do that Fíli?"

Fíli nodded, unsure if he had the strength that Thorin spoke of. He had never heard Thorin admit to fear before and his admission shook Fíli. If Thorin, a great warrior was afraid, how could Fili take courage?

"There's a good lad. Do not be afraid. I will stay with you until you sleep."

Thorin's deep voice filled the room with a familiar song. The mesmerizing tune caused Fíli's eyes to blink heavily and he felt himself drifting off to sleep despite his fear. I can be brave. He thought. For Mama and just like Uncle.

"Fíli. Wake up."

Blinking slowly at the bright sunshine that spilled into he room through the window, Fíli pushed himself up and rubbed at his eyes. His father stood above his bed gazing down at him.

"Da?" he asked sleepily.

"Yes, son. There is someone here who would like to meet you."

Fíli noticed the small bundle of blankets his father cradled in his arms. His father slowly sat on the bed beside him and curiously Fíli peered down at the bundle his father held out for him to see.

Inside the cocoon of blankets Fíli spotted a tiny baby with a shock of dark hair and a brow furrowed in sleep. Fíli looked up at his beaming father, not sure what to think of this tiny person.

"This is your brother, Kíli." His father told him.

"A brother?" Fíli looked again at the baby. When he imagined having a brother before he pictured another a child he could play with but the baby seemed so small and fragile.

"Yes. A brother." His father smiled again patting Fíli on the head.

"He is so small." Fíli said.

"Yes, for now but he is already very strong like your mother and like you. It is a great responsibility to be an older brother and I have a feeling Kíli will need you to look out for him."

Fíli met his father's gaze and frowned. He didn't know what he thought of this responsibility or of his new brother for that matter. He had liked having his mother and father to himself and not being forgotten in the corner.

His father, noticing Fíli's uncertainty reached into his pocket and placed a smooth stone in Fíli's hands. The stone shown blue and glittered in the sunlight. Fili's fingers traced the smooth lettering in Khuzdul.

"What does it say?" Fíli asked.

"It says brother and it is your promise. Your promise to me and to Kíli, that you will do all that is in your power to keep him safe." His father answered taking Fíli's hand in his own much larger one and closing is fingers around the polished rock.

"I promise," Fíli whispered feeling enormous pride swell up in his heart for this tiny baby and for the promise he swore to his father. The stone felt heavy with its added promise.

A smile as bright as the sun spread across his father's face and Fili thought he saw a tear spring from his eyes. "Would you like to hold him?"

Fili nodded, nervous about holding a person so small. His father gently laid the tiny baby in his outstretched arms guiding him to carefully hold Kíli's head. In the shift of movement, Kíli's dark bright eyes opened and met Fíli's own light gaze. Kíli's small hand waved free of the blankets and grasped Fíli's finger with such strength he was amazed.

"Hello, Kíli," he whispered. "I am your brother and I will always look out for you."

Fíli smiled at the memory of happier times in the midst of shadow. He missed his father deeply. He walked along the edge of the frozen lake thinking of his late father. He wondered if his father had somehow known he would not be there for much longer. Kíli had no memory of his father now, but Fíli would never forget the promise he made that day. He reached into his pocket and pulled the rune stone out to hold. It was a physical reminder of his duty to his family and the love of a father who would not see his sons grow up.

A hard rock of snow pelted Fíli in the back of the head with such force that he stumbled forward stretching out his hands to catch himself in case he fell. Fíli cried out as the stone flew from his grasp and skidded across smooth surface of the icy lake. He watched in desperation as the promise he made to his father flew beyond his reach.

Kíli's laughter rang out but Fíli felt nothing but a hollow pit in his stomach. Kíli clamped a hand on Fíli's shoulder but Fili could not return the joyous greeting as he gazed at what he lost.

"What is it Fíli?" Kili questioned, confused at his brother's sudden change in demeanor.

"It is nothing." Fíli answered, turning back towards home and away from the lake. He saw the realization of what had happened appear on his Kíli's face but did not press the issue. It was lost and Kíli had not meant for it to happen. He continued trudging along the path, his eyes downcast. Suddenly, he realized he did not hear his brother's footsteps in the snow behind him. He swept around in a panic fearing what his brother was up to.

Kíli's pack, rabbits, bow and arrow were deposited in the snow bank along the lake. Fíli watched in horror as is brother's silhouette crept along the ice to the rune stone lost in the middle of the frozen lake. He had already made half of the distance so there was no way Fili could pull him back.

"Kíli!" He screamed. "You fool! Get back here, that stone is not worth your life!" It will not break my promise either he thought to himself. Kíli merely waved him off and continued creeping along the frozen lake.

Transfixed, Fíli could do nothing but watch as Kíli closed the distance to the stone. He felt his heart pounding in his ears and the sinking pit that he had felt at losing the stone was replaced with all encompassing terror at his brother's recklessness. Kíli stopped and slowly bent down to pick up the rune stone. Standing up he held it above his head in celebration and started his trek back to land.

With a crack and a yell, Fíli watched helpless as Kíli plunged into the icy depths of the lake.

"Kíli!" Fíli yelled again in pure terror as Kíli head disappeared below the frozen surface. Kíli surfaced for a moment at the hole and tried to pull himself out of the water but he could not get any purchase on the ice. Mere seconds later submerged again with a shout. Fíli tossed his pack and heavy coat in a haphazard pile in the snow abandoning the extra weight. There was no time to get help and no other course of action to take. Fíli sent a silent prayer as he carefully stepped onto the ice that his mother would not lose her sons tonight to the bottom of a frozen lake. With as much speed as he dared he walked across the ice, listening for signs of cracking in the ice. Upon reaching the hole in the ice where Kíli had fallen, Fíli lay down and peered down into the dark hole. Knowing he would never be able to get out if he jumped in to follow his brother, he plunged his arms into the water desperately searching.

Placing his arms alone in the water stole his breath away but he kept searching as tears of frustration threatened to fall from his eyes. Then, when he had almost given up hope his fingers brushed against something solid. Frantically he grabbed realizing now it was his brother's arm. With a grunt he tugged the arm upwards and out of the water.

Breathing heavily, he pulled harder until Kíli's head broke the surface of the water. His brother offered no support though as he pulled him from the icy prison. Kíli was unconscious and his face blue with cold. Using one arm to pull and the other hand to grab at any sort of purchase the frozen ice could offer he roughly yanked his brother out of the water and onto the ice. He swiftly stood and grabbed both of Kíli's arms to drag him back to land. Fíli's heart pounded fearing that that they would soon be reclaimed by the icy water.

Against all his fear, he reached the snowy bank again with his brother in tow. The pounding of his heart did not stop though for Kíli made no movement. Fíli knelt beside Kíli's head and called his name, but Kíli remained still. Kíli's face was as white as the snow around them and his lips had a blue tinge that frightened Fíli to his core. He placed his head beside his brother's mouth listening for the intake of breath, but heard none.

"No!" Fíli cried. Remembering the life saving skills his uncle had taught them both he tilted Kíli's head back. He blew air into his brother's lungs and felt the rise and fall of his chest. After a few breaths, Fíli placed his head beside his brother's again and listened for breath.

"Kíli! You must breathe!" He wept, tears flowing freely down his face now. He breathed again for his brother and cried out in joy as Kíli took in a deep choking breath of his own. Fíli swiftly turned his brother on his side and Kíli began coughing up the water he breathed in under the ice. Fíli rubbed circles on his back and patted his shoulder in a soothing mantra repeating over and over again, "You're alright. You're alright."

When Kíli's coughing subsided, Fíli pulled him into hug thanking Mahal his brother was breathing again. Awkwardly he stripped Kíli of his wet coat and replaced it with the coat he had tossed off before going to rescue him. Kíli was now violently shivering against the cold and Fili knew one warm coat would not be enough. He needed to get Kíli home as quickly as possible.

"Do you think you can stand?" He asked, hating to rush his brother who had been so near death. They were not out of the woods yet though, and the bitter cold could still take Kíli from him.  
>Kíli nodded, his teeth chattering, and Fíli made to help him up when he noticed Kíli's finger firmly grasping something. Kíli opened his hand and smiled up at Fíli who sat back on his heels in bewilderment.<p>

Kíli pressed the rune stone back into Fíli's hands. "I knew how important it was to you. I could not let you lose a piece of our father on my account." Kíli said in a quavering voice.

Fíli took the stone and put it back in his pocket, warmth spreading across his chest. His voice thick with emotion, "Kíli, your life is far more important to me than any relic of the past. Even without this stone as a reminder, I could never forget the promise I made that day."

Helping Kíli to his feet and pulling his arm across his shoulders, Fili offered support to his weakened brother. Together they walked across the snow towards home forgetting the piles of supplies on the bank. Fíli felt every shiver and cough from Kíli and hoped that the grace that was shown to him in rescuing Kíli from the lake would shine down upon them again. They were still hours from home and Fíli prayed that Kíli could make the distance in the cold.


End file.
